n
17

Realized I was over-describing every scene and killing the pacing

Was in a writing group last month. Guy read my piece out loud. Got to page 3 and he's still describing the curtains. Everyone's eyes glazed over. Tipped me off when someone asked, 'Is this a writing exercise in atmosphere?' No. It was my serious piece. Cut 60% of the adjectives. Story started breathing. Anybody else have the moment where less description actually made the scene work better?
2 comments

Log in to join the discussion

Log In
2 Comments
abby_robinson58
Noticed the same thing happens with how people decorate their houses now.
5
derek_ramirez
Pushed me to think about why we pile on details in the first place. @abby_robinson58 maybe that house decoration thing is the same instinct, like people think more stuff equals more atmosphere. But doesn't it just crowd out the actual story or the actual room? I remember cutting a whole paragraph about a character's jacket color and fabric, and suddenly the scene moved forward instead of sitting there. Do you find yourself adding things back in after you cut them, or does the lean version just feel wrong for a while?
1